Have Your Cake and Eat It Too – Part 1

October 23, 2009 at 8:34 pm (Sweet Nothings/Ramblings)

Photograph by Alexia Sinclair

Photograph by Alexia Sinclair

Why is it that we women often feel so hard done by? That we feel like we are missing out on something? Don’t get me wrong, most days I feel the same. But I am coming to terms with the fact that I play the blame game and do not take responsibility for what role I have in choosing the direction of my own life.

If you are unsatisfied with aspects of your life – take note and make a decision to change them. Today. Who says you can’t have your cake and eat it too? You can be happy, healthy and financially secure if you’re willing to make the necessary changes.

For example, 5 things that I am currently unsatisfied with:
– my financial situation
– my wardrobe
– my job
– my body
– my nails (I bite them)

I can change every single one of these things, and I have started. My spring clean blitz has led me to analyse all sections of my life and try to make some changes.

My financial situation was not great. Okay, understatement – it was horrific and caused me a great deal of stress. I had to make the tough decision to stop Escapade Events in its entirety and organise pay-your-own-way events that wouldn’t massacre my credit card. Then I had to accept a loan from a loved one (something I had been refusing for months) to avoid insane credit card interest. Finally I have had to analyse my spending and restrain it with a huge suffocating chain. It feels restrictive now, but when my loan has been paid off and I am in the black again I will thank myself.

It is amazing how much money I spent unnecessarily. I would buy a coffee every morning (and a danish every second morning), then lunch (approx $12) and would go out for dinner at least 2-3 times a week. And that is just food! So this week I have been packing my own lunch (the contents of which assist Unsatisfaction Number 4) and occasionally purchasing a $2 “walk in, pre-made” coffee (yes, it’s a little burnt, but it’s $1.20 cheaper) instead of my usual. My boyfriend and I are making a conscious effort to eat out less to help our diet and pocket.

I have several essential expenses which I have been putting off in order to ‘save money’. I am naturally a very dark blonde, but have my hair lightened professionally. The time has come that my regrowth has started to irk me and it has taken every ounce of my self control to refrain from booking a hair appointment to get it done. “Just wait another week” I keep telling myself and so far, nobody has said anything horrible (to my face). My MAC concealer is also in dire need of replacement, but I have been using my concealer brush to scoop out every last bit to preserve its life just that little bit longer.

There is nothing ‘wrong’ with my wardrobe per se. I often get compliments on my outfits (usually that they are classic or elegant), but I just feel that I have moved on. It’s the feeling that I need to make serious changes and grow as a person and with that comes my personal style and appearance. Historically, most things I have bought fit into 3 categories: black, from Cue or cheap items from trends gone by. What this means for me now is that I am totally uninspired by what is in front of me because it all seems so similar. There is no personality to my wardrobe.

So, as I said in an earlier post, I am selling my wardrobe on eBay to make way for a completely revamped aesthetic version of myself. My first purchase for the new me, did still happen to be black, but it is a beautiful cropped blazer from TL Wood, that was way out of my price range but I instantly fell in love with from the Stonnington Spring Fashion award show. Now it sits on layby waiting for a couple of paydays to pass and several items on eBay to sell before it becomes the iconic first piece of my wardrobe reinvention.

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